I can’t sleep little love. We had our check up yesterday, and we found out that you’re already 7.3 pounds. I’m really really thankful that you scored 8/8 on your exam, which means you’re perfectly good in there. But 7.3 pounds is really big for a normal delivery, so I’m really worried now.
I want us to have that experience of natural birth, to share a journey through pain and elation that mothers everyday get to have. I want to give you the very best protection from the onset, which you can only get if you pass through my birth canal, undrugged, and into my arms.
Our doctor said we might still have that. There’s still a chance, since mommy’s a big girl. But for the past few months we’ve learned enough to know that the bigger you are, the higher our chances are to need a Cesarean. And mommy’s disappointed, and mommy’s sad. I’m disappointed at myself because I feel like I’m letting you down. I’m sad because I had this very clear idea how it would go, but now I’m not sure anymore.
But one thing’s for sure Oreo – mommy and daddy loves you so much. We’re still very excited about your coming, and we’ll do our best to give you that best start in life that our Oreochubbykulet deserves.
Love you baby,